Serey Timorthy

  Kampot Season Hey you, You look like you could cure me of all my summer aches. You have the resemblance of a man I pictured holding my hand. You, Are someone who could stop me from going to the site where all dignity burn away like bonfire during summer day. Hey you, You drove past me, sundown rush hour. I remember you were someone who had me wishing you were someone queer like me. Could’ve just told me your uninterested in dating same gender and I could’ve gone on as I was. I could’ve hurt less It doesn’t seem just and it is so wrong. I have some possessions of mine in my phone that they’d judge the structure of my bones and soul if they saw. Who wants to be with with me anyway?  Just like every other things, I can’t find gratitude in. Who wants to hold my hands anyway? They all think gratification is all I seek. Who wants to go out to dinner with me anyway? If they knew I only sit and mellow when alcohol take power. But, You! You look like you could tolerate me enough to w...

it resurfaced every time I listen to her songs. you, you knew who you are you, you are every of my favorite albums of hers Is it over now? Are we out of the woods yet, the 1? I remember I remember, wanted to impelled myself with a very sharp something. I remember, wanted jump of a speeding vehicle something. I remember, wanted to slit my wrist with a sharp something. Your new lovers were the clones of the dream-me. I searched on every fucked up dates for a greater something. I searched in every parties for something like you. Was it over when they undressed you? Was it over when I have gone naked in front of someone? Was it over after we hugged under that tree, 2 p.m.? Was it over when I wrote a book about us? Was it over after we dropped our very last video call during the holiday? Was it over when half-smashed my head on my bedroom floor, silent screaming, after reading your crimson letters? But it’s over now. Been over since the last  Fast forward to 730 days later, now.

Aug 1, 2022 11:10 p.m. There are things that i've said or written down that i don't really mean it. because, i always sit in front of my bedroom window, staring at the afterglow, reminiscing about the person i thought was the 1, the time when i should have said it, the time i should have to go the riverside or the time i went out alone for burger and fries. these are, most of the time, the reasons why. Their notion,  i wouldn't last a minute, but i'm still here full-fucking-time. bares it all with my lower limb, body and soul. Deep down we know they wouldn't last a minute, dear. You could either choose to free roll down the steep hill or get the fuck up and walk. I have lasted years. Aug 26, 2022 9:24 p.m. i'm waking up every day trying to tell myself that whatever I'm doing isn't a compensation to the fact that i'm a highschool dropout. an endless reassurance. i still find myself stuck in between this tug o' war. at this point, i don't even ...

I'm a High School dropout. I've spent six years in the primary and almost two years in high school I was that kid with good grades  I was praised around the school I was that kid, the one who dated at a very young age      although i was so young then, i wouldn't really call it an actual relationship     everything seemed blurry now I was that one kid that brought good grades home, until my household gifted me  "you're never good enough", "you never reach our satisfaction." The infinitely shifted goals, the abnormal standards, the perfection I have experienced mental illness when i was just 12 I didn't know I was bearing with one until i was 16 I, even, was too afraid to even admit that I was mentally ill It played the big parts in every ruin I've made throughout my life I have spent my entire childhood trying to fulfill satisfactions I used to believe that      a good boy must listen and embody others opinions       ...